The day i found out something was wrong

It was Feb 06 I went in for an ultrasound because i felt like something was wrong, My husband came with. We went in to have the ultra sound and noticed that the tech was spending an odd amount of time on Isaac's head. She kept leaving and coming back. When she was done we were told to go wait in a room the doctor wanted to see us. At this point we knew something was not right. Usually the tech is excited and showing you your baby moving and things, but this time there was none of that. The doctor came in after what seemed like hours, (really only like 20 min) and said your baby shows an increased amount of CSF in his brain and his ventricles are a little inlarged. I'm sending you to a specialist for more testing, don't panic some baby's have this but when they are born are totally fine. I asked the doctor what it was and he said, we call it hydrocephalus. He asked if we had any questions, of course with news like that you would normally have hundreds but our minds went blank we just looked at him. He gave us our appointment slip for the high risk doc and off we went. I dont think it hit me till i got to our car what just happend, I lost it crying and yelling. My husband just kept saying it will be ok. We went to my parents to get our oldest son. when i walked in the door my mom looked at me and said "is everything ok" I lost it melted down and all i could say is there is something wrong with his brain. I pulled the paper out that i had written down the name of the condition on, not knowing how to spell it we started searching the internet for information, all the links kept sending us to spina bifida sites. I was getting frustrated because as far as I knew, he didnt have spina bifida. as we kept reading I realized that most baby's with hydrocephalus also have spina bifida. Let me tell you the sites out there on these topics are very scary always giving the worst case. Your babys head will be very enlarged, they will never move there leggs, they will need to be on a vent. My mind was racing, we called family to let them know. Finally it was time to go home and wait a very very long 5 days before going to the high risk doc. When the day finally arrived my mom went with to see the doctor. we sat in thw docs office where she explained somethings about the condition and then took us over for an ultrasound, where it was confirmed that he had hydrocephalus as well as spina bifida. I remember laying on the table crying not even wanting to look at the ultrasound screen. She begain taking amnio out with a large needle for testing. As i finally looked at the screen i saw our son trying to grab this odd looking straw that was in his way. It was then that I realized no matter what he was perfect maybe not in the worlds eyes but in Gods eyes.